England prop Joe Marler has announced his retirement from international rugby.
The 34-year-old was a member of Steve Borthwick’s squad for the Autumn Nations Series but left the camp on Monday for personal reasons and has now revealed his 95-cap Test odyssey is over, although he will continue playing for Harlequins until the end of the season.
“Playing for England always felt like I was living in a dream bubble,” he said on Instagram.
“I kept waiting for it to pop and me to suddenly go back to being a gobby, overweight 16-year-old again. But you know when it’s time.”
He continued: “I can’t do what I used to do as well as I once could. I can’t keep talking about my family being my priority unless they actually are.
“I want to keep untarnished all these memories of my career, both good and bad. I don’t want to leave my house with my kids crying. I’m ready to make the change.”
It is the second time that Marler has retired having reversed his decision in 2018 to step away from the Test arena. His 12-year career at the highest level ends with appearances at three World Cups, including in the final of the 2019 tournament.
Marler subsequently apologised for the remarks and stated that he was just trying to “spark interest in a mega rugby fixture”, as well as contest the restrictions in place for facing the Maori war dance.
The 2017 British and Irish Lion has spoken openly about his mental health struggles and it was his battle with depression that convinced him to retire in 2018.
“When I first got picked to play for England, 14 years ago, I was terrified I wasn’t good enough,” Marler said.
“I had bleached hair with red bits in it. I couldn’t even drive myself to (England’s training base) Pennyhill Park. I had to ask a mate to drop me off.
“I met Martin Johnson before training and he towered over me and told me to get a hair cut.
“So I’m incredibly grateful I got to play 95 times for my country. I have to pinch myself. Did I really do that?”
Marler will see out the season at Harlequins at which point he will also retire from the club game and continue his role in assisting with the development of young props.
“Joe has been an outstanding servant to English rugby – a tough, uncompromising competitor on the field and a genuine, one-of-a-kind personality off it,” head coach Steve Borthwick said.
“We’ll miss his humour, sense of fun and the energy he brought to the squad. We’re grateful for all he’s given to England rugby and though we won’t see him in an England jersey any more, he’ll always be part of this team.”