Gareth Southgate says he leads England into the European Championship final against Spain wanting “to win so much on Sunday it hurts”.
The men’s team are through to just a third ever major final, with the Berlin showpiece offering the chance to join Sir Alf Ramsey’s 1966 World Cup heroes in immortality.
England went within a penalty shoot-out of becoming kings of the continent three years ago and Southgate is desperate to go one better against favourites Spain at the Olympiastadion.
Asked if the outcome of Sunday’s Euro 2024 showpiece would define him, the long-serving manager said: “It will. But in the eyes of others.
“Where I’m fortunate is that age and experience has made me more comfortable with who I am, what I’m good at, what I need to be better at.
“I completely understand that in the end, winning and what they means completely changes how you’re going to be viewed by other people.
“But the margins are so far and there are bits you can affect, others you are not going to effect.
“I would probably have felt differently about that three years ago, five years ago, but I’m in a different space now and that’s a good thing because otherwise I’d have been in a mess these last five weeks.”
Few know the highs and lows that come with representing England better than Southgate, who saw his penalty saved in the Euro 96 semi-final shoot-out loss to Germany.
That was one of four major tournaments the proud Englishman went to as a player, with these Euros his fourth as manager.
“As a player and an athlete, you view those failures in a different sort of way,” Southgate said ahead of his 102nd match in charge. “As a coach, manager, leader, you recognise what you’re doing well.
“Had we gone out in the first knockout round here, I know I’ve managed this period better than I did in Russia (at the 2018 World Cup), but that wouldn’t be how it was viewed and it would sound like nonsense to the man in the street.
“I completely understand that, but I know the job now and I’m really clear on being my own biggest critic, reviewing everything clearly.
“So, I know there is a body of work there and how we’ve worked with different teams, different groups of players that we’ve brought together to get the outcomes that we have.
“I want to win so much on Sunday it hurts, don’t get me wrong, but I can handle whatever comes and I know it’s not going to change what the dog thinks when I walk back through the door.”
Southgate’s comments about how much he wants to win raised eyebrows and a question as to how he keeps his emotions in check, leading him to say he is “the type of guy who you have to prod a lot to get a bark”.
The England boss credits his father, Clive, for that trait, which allows him to go from serene to punching the air and screaming “one more!” after the semi-final win against the Netherlands.
Put to Southgate, fans rarely see that side, he said: “Well, it doesn’t look so great if you beat Lithuania away. People would question that a bit more I guess.
“Look, I was doing that in 1990 when David Platt scored and I was doing that in 1982 when Bryan Robson scored, so that’s where I am.
“I’m an England fan in the dugout, I have more responsibility now. I’m desperate for England to win and I was the same as a player. I would celebrate with the fans at all of my clubs.
“I know sometimes because I’m not like that on the sideline, people might view that differently but my job on the sideline is to make good decisions, not to be a cheerleader.”
Southgate is now hoping to “bring some temporary happiness” to what has been an “angry country” by making history on Sunday.
Such rage is clear on social media and also in the stands during the early stages of these Euros, with boos greeting the end of the group draws against Denmark and Slovenia.
Southgate also had beer cups aimed at him after the latter stalemate in Cologne, but he was unflinching in the face of negativity.
“There was a danger (things unravelled) but I was determined to confront it,” he said.
“When the beer came over I was going to go and walk towards it because we fought too hard to change the environment for the players.
“We’ve got players here who are in their first tournament. They’ve actually come into it.
“We’ve got players who have learnt how to win with us and have been with us all the way through.
“We’ve got some who’ve got no fear anyway. But if we’d suddenly had this environment where it’s ‘I’m not so sure I did enjoy that’ that would have undone the progress we’ve made.
“So, I felt it important to fight for that in that moment. I was the only who was going to be able to do that really.
“And I have no problem if I’m the lightning conductor – to take that for the players. Because in the end that’s the job. The job is to allow them to perform at their best.”